Friday, June 29, 2012

You're (Not) Welcome

OK. Here it is. Let’s just get rid of the response, “You’re welcome.” No preface, no profound exposition. It’s just that simple.

Why? Think about it. 

I hold the door open for some woman. It’s pouring rain and freezing cold, but I wait, go out of my way to perform this chivalrous deed. Genuinely appreciative, she tosses me a warm, hearty smile and a vociferous, “Thank you so much!”

That’s all that is necessary. I performed a deed, and you re-payed it in the best way you could given time and situational constraints. I don’t need to then pay you back for that repay.

I mean, if I go buy a pair of new shoes, I give the cashier money of some form, he gives me the shoes, and the transaction is done. I am not obligated to give the store or that cashier anything in return for that service, except maybe a Thank You.

Same concept here folks. Plus, You’re Welcome has the potential to get us all caught in some nasty feedback loop of giggling niceties. See this short play:

Party 1 has performed a good deed for Party 2.
Party 2: Thank You
Party 1: You’re Welcome
Party 2: (thinking, what should I say now) Um, thank you, uh, for saying you’re welcome (a nervous giggle occurs)
Party 1: Oh, you’re very welcome (tee hee hee, another giggle, just not as nervous)
Party 2: Thank you (hahahaaha)

Stop it! See what I mean?

Now, I’m not advocating eradicating the phrase completely from our lexicon. It’s still viable when you want to offer something to someone:

Party 1: Hey man, can I borrow this can of shaving cream?
Party 2: You’re welcome to it, bro!

Do a quick web search regarding etymology, and it becomes quite clear that no one really knows how You’re Welcome was chosen as a response the powerful Thank You.

So, let’s do ourselves a favor and stop the madness!
Are you with me? Thank you.

You’re welcome…to reply!

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